My goldfish is made of electricity

… or, is literature an antidote to the destructive forces in the world?


Retrieved from

Projections / Woolfy vs. Projections The Astral Projections of Starlight (music album). Retrieved from

“—One day I was a goldfish, and… One day I was a goldfish, and…” repeated Gerald all day long. He could never think through a single sentence. Besides, of course that he was a goldfish and he hasn’t changed, he is still a goldfish. Ha, but he never remembers this simple fact! I could not be mad at him because I knew that he was trying hard. But what do you expect of a friend with a span of two seconds of memory: he could try as hard as he wanted, it wouldn’t change anything, he would never be able to finish a simple sentence. Eight syllables, that was already a great achievement for a goldfish named Gerald. Even though I would like to explain it to him, he would forget the beginning of my sentence before I even reach the end of it. Besides, Gerald could not care less about learning the history but as an upside of his condition he never got himself into any troubles. He was just a quiet little goldfish. So, I decided to take care of him, I fed him and I watched him swimming around and around in the same round jar all day long. Though I found that watching at Gerald eating his tail was just perfect for allowing me to meditate in a serious fashion.

Meanwhile, sometimes it is he who stops straight in my direction, staring at me with his big grey eyes. He too seems to meditate when he freezes like that. One day as he took this frozen position for a bit too long I thought that he might have been dead, but he woke up and swam away like a snake before my fingers could reach his subtle body as I plunged my hands in the jar. I was always impelled to think that with only two seconds of memory span he surely could not have a strand of personality… yet, he looked somehow very familiar to me, how strange is that. He cannot know anything, yet he knows much more about meditation than I do: he already lives in a state of perfect harmony. Sometimes it even makes me jealous (just a bit). Surely, being a human is a much more difficult task and unlike Gerald who has attained equanimity, I struggled very much to clean up the mess cluttering up with my mind.

To calm myself I often need to jump on my bed (from which I can see Gerald in the jar on the shelve) and to quiet the noises in my head I would try to forget the world by reading lines of poetry. But one day something amazing happened. As I was reading Wordsworth’s (1770 – 1850) poem “Line Written In Early Spring where the author speaks of the sacred balance of life and man causing the disruption of this natural state of peace, I suddenly backed out. Then, as my eyelids opened up again to the external world, everything seemed quite different. My room was the same but the colours… the colours were so bright and splendid; and all the objects around me, it’s like if I could see through them. Following to this first impression I lifted my hands in front of my face so I could inspect them and as a matter of fact I was able to see through them as well! I jumped out of my bed in the direction of the window… and all became exceedingly magic. It was the night but I could see through the dark and all the trees outside were glowing like christmas trees. It’s like if every leafs were bulbs of shining light. The lights were everywhere striking like storms but quiet as squirrels. The silence was perfect until a voice started talking to me behind my shoulder, I turned back to the voice and I nearly blacked out again, I could not believe what I saw: Gerald was making complex sentences!

Picture retrieved from the cover illustration of Stephan A. Hoeller’s book: “Gnosticism, New Light on the Ancient Tradition of Inner Knowing”.

I wanted to ask him… though before I could articulate a single word as he flew through the air back and forth towards me and as he began to speak again, I had no other choice but to listen. He said to me: “—My dear human friend, I know that seems crazy but just try to realise what happened and what you are doing in this place. Look at me, I’m a goldfish and here I am flying around like a bird in your room. You see, we are in a higher realm, this is not the physical, this is the spiritual dimension. Can you realise now?” Well, yeah, for sure I was realising, and I was really enjoying it actually. Can I stay there, I asked Gerald, who answered: “—you can stay as much as you want but you can also come and go as you like whenever you want”, and he added with a serious tone in his voice: “—however, you might want to learn more of the physical world before you decide coming living here for good.” What do you mean, I asked to the Goldfish, “—well, you might think that the physical world is a superficial place once you discover the higher realm. But you need to know that if the physical was created by the spiritual, there is a good reason to it. In fact, it is all an experiment in which you and I and all the others are part of it. But the experiment isn’t finished, we need the experiential data from the physical world in order to allow the spiritual dimension to evolve as well.”

I chilled out for a moment, the time to digest the avalanche of new information, then it all started to make sense, everything seemed to perfectly blend in the most logical way. The human form and the physical laws are only the outermost expressions of an excessively unseen larger world the constituents of which are far more malleable than the unrelenting physical format of matter as we know it on Earth. In fact, the Earth is like a playground for it allows the spirit to materialise itself into a substance enabling the soul to physically explore further emotions that it would never have experienced otherwise. Fear and love are literally the dark force and the bright force acting dualistically behind the scene of life. This constant battle between both forces is precisely what enables the living beings to evolve. Fear is part of the process to becoming more conscious and so it is a necessary evil that allows man to learn to become humble and ever more loving. Now I get it, that is the path of mankind! But before I could come to fully realise how profound were the implications led by this first glimpse of wisdom, the harshness of a “Clap! Clap!” brought me back to the goldfish who was flipping his tail against my cheek. “It’s so wonderful!” I said spontaneously before Gerald would continue by adding the following words: “—You do understand now, don’t you! Your literature, for example, is an important piece of the creation. Every word that is ever written in the physical dimension displays a holographic imprint in the spiritual one. But you see, we need more words in order to write the grand story. Now, can you see the big picture?”

Tibby Aubry, 16th April 2016 © \ Literature; text registered at ACU. [This post is a Duplicatus of the same title archived in Project: 19th Century]


3 thoughts on “My goldfish is made of electricity

  1. That was some trip! Just joking. A wonderful piece of writing about how literature can cause us to have epiphanies.. moments of enlightenment that can change your whole life. Your way of thinking will never be the same again.
    You may wish to reread what you have written and edit. There is a whole passage that is repeated as well as a few typos or spelling errors. Good work though Mr Tibby.


    • Thanks, Dave! This WordPress automatic saving makes my head in, it’s uncontrollable: while editing the post it adds and deletes stuff without letting you noticing what happened, and I cannot even get rid of this stupid option in the free version of WordPress “.COM”. Concerning the typos that you mention I’m unable to spot them but thank you for letting me know :) And, yes, I definitely agree with you on the fact that literature has the power to transform one’s life, this being even truer when it’s your very own creative writing. By the way, Dave, I read the piece you wrote on schooling and I was happy to see that I was not the only one being aware of these realities that we mention both of us in our respective posts to that topic :) Take care my friend!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Peer review, Tibby | Dave Z'Art

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